03.10.2006 - It was a dark and stormy night, except for the sunshine and gentle breeze. I fixed my steely eyes on the mysterious and foreboding abode
that lay before me, knowing what I had to do, but not quite ready to do it. Then I put on my blue suit and mask and head lamp, and I was in fact quite ready.
I found the secret portal to the labyrinth below the forbidden fortress, and said the secret password: "Open". The password didn't work, so I used my hands
instead of my larynx and removed the crawlspace door. I took a deep breath and started to crawl inside. But I had to let out the deep breath so that I could
fit through the small hole. I peered around through the murky depths, wondering where the treasure might lie. With grit and determination and a garbage bag in
hand, I worked my way to the core of the dark abyss. I battled the mighty water pipe and defeated the discarded beer bottle. Then suddenly I came upon that
which I sought - the glorious treasure - the opossum carcass that would guarantee me a $129 service fee. I thought it would be easy pickings, but I wasn't
expecting the booby trap - an infantry of fleas and maggots 1000 strong. After a mighty battle that I don't feel like writing about, the treasure was mine.
I made my way out of the dank hellhole, which I can only assume was crumbling and self-destructing in a massive inferno just behind me as I crawled out, and
emerged triumphantly with my prize - a dead opossum in the shape of a flapjack. A delicious, juicy, furry flapjack. It had been another amazing adventure,
fraught with peril, but rich with reward. Stay tuned for next week's adventure, when I brave the dizzying heights of Everest in search of the wild Yeti -
aka squirrel on a roof.
Do it yourself: Visit my How To Find and Get Rid of Dead Animals page for tips and advice.
Get professional help: Visit my Nationwide Pro Directory of dead wildlife removal experts.
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or click my below banner to hire a local trapper.
Removal of dead critters gets challenging as you have to get your hands dirty and bear the stinky stench. The task of removing the nuisance animal that died under your elevated house is even more challenging. But, it's very important to remove the carcass at its earliest stage to prevent the endlessly foul smell filling the house. Moreover, the dead animal is food for insects and flies that can spread diseases if you get near them.
If you don't wish to deal with the dirty task, dead animal removal companies can always be at your service.
How Do Animals Die Under the House?
Commonly, animals such as raccoons, rats, moles, and birds die under the house. A few reasons for dying pests under the house are: