Dead Squirrel in Ceiling

10.03.2005 - A dead squirrel in a ceiling is no big deal, really. It happens all the time. Squirrels live in ceilings, homeowners are too lazy or cheap or ignorant to have them removed when the squirrel is alive, but then eventually it dies and creates a horrible smell inside the home, and then the people therein decide to do something. To be fair, some people don't know that they have squirrels up in the ceiling, but these same people must also be deaf. Anyway, they do have a sense of smell - they are not asnomiacs - and then I get called to do the dirty work at my low, low prices. This job wouldn't be noteworthy except for one thing - this was a parallel cathedral crawl. I've only done a few in my life. This means that the ceiling was a cathedral ceiling of the same angle as the roof - meaning that I had to squirm my way in an extremely narrow gap for a long distance. Basically, the crawl from hell that no one in his right mind, or with greater than 5% body fat, could make. But I dragged my crazy skinny ass up through that tight gap from hell, and when I got to the top I found an open cavity above the front door area with this dead squirrel inside. Some flesh-eating ants had found it as well. I put a few of the ants down my shirt for good measure, bagged the squirrel, and went on my merry way.