Florida Bat Removal Project

08.21.2004 - I faced many challenges in this bat removal project. One of the most common problems in bat control lies in reaching the bats. Since they can fly and I cannot, they can easily reach places that I cannot easily reach. In this case, the bats chose to roost in the barrel tiles of this roof, in several areas, including the towers. In order to reach the towers, I had to bring ladders onto the flat roof portion. Interestingly, I had to navigate them up a spiral staircase.

Once I got the ladders on the roof, I faced the second challenge - tiles. Tiles are always a pain. I basically have to net thousands of square feet of tile and seal thousands of square feet of tile. It's a lot of work.

The final challenge I faced in this particular bat removal project was the Florida sun in August. I waited until mid-August to do this project, because the young bats are fully weaned and able to fly at this point. I suppose the August sun is not as bad as the June or July sun, but that might be like saying that roasting is better than scorching - it was still some powerful sun, and I was powerful stupid. As you can see in the photo, I worked shirtless. I worked all day shirtless on the first day, and I wore no sunscreen. How I can be so stupid at this age boggles my mind, but when I have kids and they don't put on their sunscreen and I say, "do you want skin cancer? Do you want wrinkles when you grow up? Do you want sunburn?" and they still don't bother to put on sunscreen, well, I don't deserve to say a word. My parents gave me all of these warnings, and I still never listened. I may not have cancer or wrinkles, but I got a hell of a sunburn. I actually got sun poisoning. I don't know if I'd describe it as textbook painful, but it was worse than most pain. Like a kick in the balls, it was just a whole different league of discomfort. It felt like an itch that simply burned through my soul - like all of my inner organs burned with an unquenchable fire - and electric shocks riveted my body in spasms. It was a disaster.

Aside from that, the project went great! After a week of uncomfortable labor, I got all the bats safely out, and sealed the building perfectly. I had the satisfaction of completing a difficult Florida bat removal project in a professional manner, and I learned a valuable lesson - never tell your kids to wear sunscreen, because they won't listen anyway.

Do it yourself: Visit my How To Get Rid of Bats page for tips and advice.
Get professional help: Visit my Nationwide Pro Directory of wildlife removal experts.

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